How to Handle Boredom: Beat the Summer Blues

   I've taken an informal poll and discovered that the words "I'm bored" exasperate parents more than any others uttered by their children. More than cursing; more than whining; more than bickering with siblings.  

   "You can't be bored," you may insist. "You have a room full of toys and games. If you're feeling benevolent, you might offer to occupy your despondent child by playing with him. But soon enough, he's bored again. So, what's the reason for boredom and can you un-teach it?  

   Almost every child can learn to reduce his own boredom and you can help him learn how. Once you do, both you and your child will be happily less plagued — he by boredom, you by nagging. 

   Many children default to boredom rather than working through the frustration of figuring out what to do. They don't want to manage the decision-making process, and so they don't even try.  

   Another cause of boredom is the assumption that only another person can cure the tedium. When you jump in immediately to resolve it, either by playing or micro-organizing, it communicates that you too believe your child is helpless. 

   This frustration and sense of helplessness will be reduced when your child discovers that she can resolve her own boredom. It's an older child's version of self-soothing — the skill babies and toddlers adopt in order to learn to sleep through the night and to stop themselves from having tantrums.  

   Ignoring boredom, offering electronic solutions, or delivering yourself up as a panacea will not teach your child that he is capable of self-created fun. Each time your child utters those fateful words, is a chance to show her she's not helpless and doesn't have to give in to frustration. Here's how: